The world has probably seen the most change in the last 150 years then it has seen from all the years prior. Institutions that have existed from the beginning of time have not even been spared from this age of change. Two of the oldest institutions that have been knocked off their foundations in the last 50 years is traditional marriage and the family structure.
As we know change is inevitable for most things. But, who would have thought that these two institutions would also be affected the way they have? We need to understand that marriage and family is the foundation of all our societies. They are the foundation of who we are and how we interact with other people. Our parents and our families are those that establish our personal ideology as we learn, grow and become a part of the social construct that is life. For more than a millennia, the family construct has existed and persevered over anything else that has existed.
With the changes in our families, we are seeing those effects more and more in our societies. The question is, what has caused this massive shift? Was it the people, was it society, or was it inevitable to happen because change happens no matter what?
Families today are not what they use to be. I believe very few of us came from an unbroken family. Most of us have experienced divorce, step parents, half siblings, along with step brothers and sisters. These events have an affect on us, if we want to believe it or not. Remember we established that change was inevitable, and with said changes come the affects.
There are some variables in society that are not earth shaking when it comes to the family construct but, they do play a role in changing the way people view and experience things. These variables are race, culture, and religion. When these variables come together they create new dynamics within the marriage relationship and the family. There are now many mixed families throughout the world. Mixed families can be made up of many different types of people. I’m not just referring to racial stereo types. We can also call them blended families or non traditional families. The word family now has multiple meanings from what it once was. Basically a family today is made up of whomever you live with, and have a relationship with which you consider family. The original family construct is changing.
I come from a traditional family that has seen its fair share of divorce and remarriage. So much that I have 1 full sibling, 3 half siblings, and 7 step siblings. I have had 2 step moms and 2 step dads not to mention all the others that we mere relationships between marriages. My grandparents are just as guilty. It’s like a revolving door of family members coming and going in your life. For me I have just rolled with the punches, but for some it is not that easy.
How has being in a broken, blended or mixed family affected you? Are you stronger? Have you been traumatized? Or, are you numb like me? I think experiences we have in our lives and within our families are what affects us and creates who we become. Our parents and our family have huge influences over us. yes, we have the ability to choose who we want to be and are going to be, but we cannot ignore the underlying foundation we were given.
How are you? Are you good? Do you need help? Do you need to make changes to find happiness? What kind of family are you going to have, and how has your experience going to affect it? The world is always changing and the people on it are always changing with it. Do the best you can to live learn and grow so you can write a happy ending to your story. Like I say in my book What’s Your Story “your past does affect you, but it does not define you”.
Know that there are many of us like you, no matter what type of family you have come from, there are others like you. We are all more alike than we truly know. Sometimes we just need to share our stories, to understand one another. Be strong, be happy, because you can have a great family, no matter how it’s built.
